0:15
Oh, hell yeah. Now we're talking.
0:18
Is that a skateboard?
0:20
Yeah, that that that might work. You
0:21
know how to ride one of those? Okay, I
0:24
typed in skateboard how to do and this
0:27
video popped up. should teach you how to
0:29
use that thing, maybe. Good luck.
0:32
What's up? If you're watching this
0:33
video, you just purchased one of our
0:35
skateboard city skateboard products. And
0:37
you're probably wondering, how the heck
0:39
do I use this? Well, I've got great news
0:41
for you. I'm Mark Sizzler, the youngest
0:43
ever CEO of Skateboard City with the
0:46
official skateboard city skateboard
0:51
Oh, look who needs me. Oh, look who
0:54
needs me. Hold up. This is kind of fun.
1:02
So, the first thing you're going to want
1:03
to do is mount your skateboard. To do
1:06
that, you're going to hold forward and
1:13
sprint button. Maybe that means pushing
1:15
in the left joystick. Or maybe it's
1:17
pressing one of the buttons on your
1:18
keyboard. See, here at Skateboard City,
1:21
you define the way you skate.
1:26
Now, if you want to steer, which can be
1:28
very thrilling on one of our official
1:30
skateboard City skateboard products,
1:32
you're mostly going to be moving the
1:34
camera around, either the right joystick
1:36
or your mouse. I can't know which one of
1:39
these you're using. I can't know
1:41
everything. I wish I could know
1:43
everything because then maybe I could
1:44
have saved my dad, the great Barney
1:46
Sizzler, from taking the final slam, aka
1:55
When I took over as CEO of Skateboard
1:57
City after my dad, Barney Sizzler, got
1:59
run over by a space car while riding one
2:01
of our skateboard City skateboard
2:03
products, I made two vows. The first is
2:07
that I would never get run over by a
2:09
space car like my piece of [ __ ] dad who
2:12
didn't know how to skateboard. Two is
2:14
that I would personally teach every
2:17
skateboard city skateboard customer how
2:19
to skateboard so that they'd be
2:21
prevented from suffering the same fate
2:23
as my dad because they didn't know how
2:25
to steer while driving into traffic
2:28
going 44 mph which is actually very slow
2:38
Lastly, I would just like to mention
2:39
that skateboard has not known the use of
2:41
our skateboard products in the street or
2:44
in any other places where space cars
2:46
might be found. This is because we've
2:49
yet to perfect our anti-pace car
2:57
Not so fast, traitor.
3:00
You can't kill me that easy. What the
